My hands are torn up from all these broken bottles / I can’t stand, lost too much, I know I’ve got my problems – The Devil Wears Prada, “Broken”, Color Decay
Recently I came across a new album that I quite enjoyed, but as I listened to the lyrics, it saddened me. It brought me back to a dark time in my life. A time filled with alcohol abuse, longing for the pain in my heart to go away, and praying to God, much like Elijah did, “If you love me God, then don’t let me wake up tomorrow.” It was a dark time, yet as I reflect on that time now, I look back on it with a strange fondness.
No trial has overtaken you that is not faced by others. And God is faithful: He will not let you be tried beyond what you are able to bear, but with the trial will also provide a way out so that you may be able to endure it. – 1 Corinthians 10:13
The reason I am able to look on this dark time in my life positively is because I know how the time ended. I overcame it. It sucked in the moment and, when I reflect, I can still feel a phantom pain in my heart from that period. However, I know that in spite of that trial, it was not my end. I overcame and have grown. In spite of how painful it was, if given the choice, I would endure it again because it shaped who I am now and has given me a vision for the future.
And also that everyone should eat and drink, and find enjoyment in all his toil, for these things are a gift from God – Ecclesiastes 3:13
God will give us trials in this life, but these trials are ultimately a gift from God. God uses them to grow us and mature us. He will allow us to suffer for His glory, whether it be to allow you to minister to others more effectively or to strengthen you for trials that come ahead in life. Whenever I become discouraged now and begin to lose hope in the dream that is in my heart, I can reflect on the fact that I have conquered hopelessness once and, by the power of Christ in me, I can do it again.
Therefore, rejoice O brethren whenever trials come your way for we know that God will not allow us to drown in the seas of death but will give us the resources we need to conquer the stormy seas. The Conquering King lives inside of us and no power in heaven or hell can overcome Him.
And, after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace who called you to His eternal glory in Christ will Himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To Him belongs the power forever. Amen. – 1 Peter 5:10-11